IM SO FUCKING MAD THAT YOU LIED TO ME, THAT YOU CHOOSE ME LAST, THAT YOU TREAT ME LIKE SHIT AND THAT YOURE HIDING SHIT FROM ME. IM SO FUCKING HURT THAT ITS MAKING ME CRAZY AND ANGRY AND INSANE AND IM PACING AND CHAIN SMOKING AND I WANT TO BURY THIS SHIT IN MY SKIN SO THAT MY BONES WONT ACHE ANYMORE WITH THE THOUGHT OF HOW MUCH YOU FUCKING HURT ME. FUCK YOU.
Maya Angelou (via creatingaquietmind)
take a year. take a lifetime.
I’m tired of saying sorry for things I shouldn’t be sorry for, all because you let me believe that I’m doing things wrong when you should be encouraging me that I’m okay, that I’m wanted. I’m hurt that I’m not cared for as much as I care for you. I’m tired of being insecure, I’m beautiful and smart and I’m caring and I’m funny. I deserve to be confident. But you teach me to be submissive in a way that makes me feel that I’m never good enough, that I’m just making you feel bad so you hold on. I’m tired of second guessing everything I do and say in fear that I offend you or that I appear even less as appealing to you. I give you everything I can. I want to be there for anything you need to let go of, even if it hurts me to hear. I’ve forgotten what it’s like to be happy. I’m tired of this anxiety that I’m not good enough. And shame on you for not trying as hard I try every fucking day for you to make you comfortable, just to get a glimpse of your happiness, knowing that I caused it.